Friends, this is another post I don’t know how to start. With a very heavy heart I have to report that Lexy has made her transition to the Rainbow Bridge.
On June 7 I took Lexy to the vet because she wasn’t feeling well, and she seemed to be having another flareup of her IBD. These flareups were coming on more frequently than usual. She received treatment and improved over the next several days. Her bloodwork from this appointment showed that her kidney levels were extremely high, and all symptoms pointed to kidney failure. I started her on a kidney diet and watched her fluid intake (because she was not a candidate for at home fluids.)
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| The last picture I took of her at home. |
We had an appointment for follow up bloodwork on July 16. I’m glad that appointment was on the books because she was not feeling well again. She was nauseous and barely eating, and this time she had diarrhea and a fever. She received treatment and I was sent home with more meds. She was now on Prednisolone, Mirataz, Cerenia and Flagyl daily. Bloodwork this time showed a great improvement in her kidney levels, but her WBC was extremely high.
She started eating that afternoon and ate very well. But her appetite decreased daily and at one point she wouldn’t even lick at her food. After a couple of days of not eating, and looking worse, I didn’t think I could wait to get her to the vet and decided an ER visit was necessary.
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| Eating! Unfortunately, it didn’t last long. |
I took her to the ER early in the morning on July 21. Her kidney levels had increased again, so the plan was to hospitalize her for either 12 or 24 hours so she could receive fluids and other meds in an attempt to bring her kidney values down. I went home to get some food for her and returned in the afternoon. I was told she would have bloodwork around 8:00 pm and the doctor would call me between 9:00 and 10:00 pm with an update. I was back at the ER at 7:00 pm, I wasn’t waiting for a phone call. Her kidney values did not change, and the doctor said although she knew how much I wanted to bring Lexy home, she advised against it and suggested she stay overnight to continue to receive fluids. The evening nurse assigned to her told me she would most likely get bloodwork around 8:00 am the next morning and the doctor would probably call me at 10:00 am. Lexy had started eating pretty well, and I left the ER in better spirits.
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| She started enjoying the window again! She never lost that sassy leg pose. |
I was back at 8:30 am because, once again, I wasn’t waiting for a phone call. I was also planning on getting my girl home as early as possible. When I arrived, she hadn’t had her morning exam yet. I visited with her a bit and when they started working with her, I went to sit in the waiting room.
The doctor came out to speak to me, and the news was exactly the opposite of what I was expecting. Some very concerning complications had reared their ugly heads overnight. They performed an ultrasound because her kidney levels and WBC went up – Lexy was filling up with fluid. There was fluid surrounding her heart and lungs, as well as other cavities in her body. There were abnormalities with her liver as well and most likely she had cancer that metastasized. (My vet and I had always discussed the possibility of cancer due to her intestinal inflammation, but she always improved and got better with treatment for IBD.)
When I told him I wanted to take her home and keep her comfortable (I wasn’t thinking straight at that point), I was told that wasn’t really an option because her heart could stop, or she could have trouble breathing at any point. I asked him to call my vet to explain everything to her.
My vet, Dr. Clough, called me immediately after hanging up with the ER doctor and further explained the seriousness of the situation. I opted to take Lexy to her for euthanasia rather than having it done at the ER.
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| She was always a helpful co-worker. |
Lexy received outstanding care at the ER. One Vet Technician in particular was very smitten with her and was so kind. At the end of his shift, he came over to her kennel to say goodbye and she meowed at him. He said to her, “Oh, now you’re going to chat me up?” He then put his things down, opened the door, and started loving up on her. And with a big smile on his face, he kissed her nose. I will never forget that.
It all happened quickly. So quickly, that my last couple of hours with her are still a blur and I wonder if those memories will remain clouded forever. Her euthanasia even went quickly. Faster than Lola’s. I feel so much guilt over the fact that she spent her last night on this earthly plane without me, alone in a hospital, even though I have to realistically remember that if I didn’t take her to the ER she could have passed very uncomfortably at home. I try to find solace in the fact that she passed with a full belly and was not starving, and that we caught this in time before she suffered a great deal. It was so fast, though, that I feel our last moments lacked the quality she deserved.
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| One of her favorite places during her last weeks. |
Lexy chose her transition very much the same way she lived her life – very practical and without pomp and circumstance. Even though I wanted to bring her home and have her transition on our bed, just like Lola did, that was not the way it was supposed to be. In the end, I did what was best for her, not me.
Just as I did with Lola, I listened to Lexy every step of the way. We fought everything that came our way with every ounce of our being, and when she said enough and that the time was right then, I honored that. I just can’t believe how quickly she deteriorated, and my mind is still spinning over it.
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| Lexy in the hospital before we left. |
I want to extend many, many thanks to the staff at Veterinary Emergency Group in White Plains, NY, and to my vet, Dr. Lauren Clough, at Feline Veterinary Medical Center. I cannot find words to express my gratitude to all of them, or for the gratefulness I have for my relationship with Dr. Clough.
Thank you Coryelle, my dear friend, for answering my call early in the morning and talking me through the situation and for connecting with Lexy. And thank you to one of my oldest friends, Desiree for your insight and words of comfort. Desiree pictured Lexy flying around my head and felt that my sign from her would have something to do with birds.
A few hours after I got home, I had to get out of the house. As I approached my garage, two Mourning Doves were sitting there and then they both flew off into the sky together. I’m hoping that was my sign.
Thank you to all of you for your comments on social media, text messages, calls and DMs. Your support and caring at this time is so appreciated.
And thank you to Ann Adamus of Zoolatry for the beautiful graphics for Lexy.
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My heart is shattered into a million pieces right now. I lost her six months and six days after Lola. I had only recently really started to heal from Lola’s transition, and the reason I was healing was because of Lexy. Lexy was always my rock, my best friend. Her personality was always constant, and I could count on that. She was my soulmate, and I know I was her true love. She taught me that it’s okay to love again after loss, and she opened up my closed heart and brought warmth and light back to cold, dark places.
I’m really lost on how to move ahead right now because Lexy and Lola were the main voices of the blog. I don’t feel like I’m done writing, but I’m not quite sure how to proceed. I’m sure I’ll figure things out in some time and will return. Cats need help, and I can’t ignore that.
My Lexy Pops. My Bub. My Sassy Pants Girl. My Little Boo Boo. My Sunshine. What will I do without you? What will my world be like now? I will miss and love you forever and a day.
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| She was heartbroken after losing Lola. |
I know Lola was waiting for you, and the Dynamic Duo are together again. You missed her so much. Godspeed and fly free, my little love. Enjoy your body being whole again and feeling well. I know that’s what you wanted. One day our special little family will again be the Dynamic Trio and I hope you’ll both be waiting for me, many years from now, with open paws.
Thank you all for loving her. This isn’t the post that Lexy deserves, so I will be back with an epic one for her.
— Toronto Cat Rescue
